Sept 15, 2025: WSPD 2025/Recent Affairs.
It’s Monday, happiness crusaders! Glory to God!
This past week specifically has had me in such a mental cloud. Nothing is making sense, there’s so much negativity and hatred in the world, and it feels like I’ve been driving a struggle bus right through a thriving society. Let me personally send my condolences to anyone that lost a friend, father, mother, brother, sister, etc. this past week. Again, there’s so much negativity and none of it makes sense. It’s not what Jesus calls us to do.
I keep wanting to do these blips on Facebook, falling into the tendencies of when I was 14-15. It’s partially why I’m so hesitant on putting anything on social media these days. To say I’ve been met with loud oppositions is a bit of an understatement. It’s cool though. I took the broken pieces of this mosaic that I call “my life”, rebuilt it to be something incredibly beautiful and God-filled, and grabbed a big ol bag of self-confidence on the way back to Georgia. There was a lot I was excited to see/do again. There was a lot of anxiety knowing I’d return to everything that I either broke or it broke me. Here’s a few things I’ve come to terms with:
Those I grew up with aren’t as forgiving as they’ve led themselves to be. Only I can blame myself for my past actions for causing that resentment. It’s always “forgive me Jenna, for I’ve done wrong… BUT I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU!” and I think that’s really telling on those people.
I’m also a lot more nostalgic than I already believed about myself. Along with the negativity that this town/county curates and holds, I was blessed to cross paths with certain individuals in my time. I’m grateful to be able to connect with some of those people on social media, but if that’s as far as it’s going to go… respectfully, stay over there. If you prefer the virtual presence of me and not me physically, you have no room in my life.
My capability to love has changed a lot over the years. There was a lot that I tolerated that I shouldn’t have. There’s things I’ve said and done that I wouldn’t dare trying again. Love is a choice. It’s a consistent, conscious choice. People around me seem to lose grasp of that concept. I’m blessed to be surrounded by those who haven’t lost sight of that and show me every single day, that love persists. I’m blessed to have my daughter who shows me the significance and importance on keeping and maintaining my relationships with my gal pals. For allowing me to be the mother I’ve always needed and wanted. I’m forever grateful for you, G. 💖
Needless to say, I was excited to come back to GA to see and reunite with so many people. It turns out literally only 3 people were excited with me. People change. They hold different values. Life happens. I do often wonder if I “grabbed myself by my boot straps” and stayed in FL, if that would have any greater affect on my relationships with the 3 people. Would I be happier?
This all has been weighing heavily on me the last few months. Rejection and dismissal of your thoughts and feelings isn’t a good feeling.
Until next time, I’ll leave here with three things that make me happy:
Thanksgiving dinner, baking desserts just for the heck of it, the color purple.
Celebrate what makes you happy always,
Jenna/Starshine ✨
